An Oblique Mind, The problem with "nice guys"

Notes: 497 / 9 months ago from ceasesilence (originally from lawsonry)
The problem with "nice guys"
lawsonry:

dragnostic:

If you don’t see what’s wrong with being a Nice Guy, it’s this: despite your “nice” actions, you are still living under the assumption that how you treat a woman entitles you to some sort of appreciation, or some part of her body. If you haven’t noticed by now, this makes you an asshole, too.

Okay, this is going a little too far. Have you ever considered the fact that guys can actually be nice? Like, genuinely nice people?
In a lot of religions and things, women are portrayed as being inherently dirty and evil just because they’re women. Feminism has been working hard to break this belief. But now, you’re just flipping it around and implying that, just because you’re a guy, you are inherently dirty and evil. Just like there are good, clean women, there are also kind, well-meaning men.
And on that note, if someone’s nice to you - yeah, you do owe them something. Gratitude and friendship and respect. In any situation.
Pull yourself back down to Earth, please.

What? The article is talking about “Nice Guys”, not guys who are nice. Please re-read, or check out the previous reblogs or comments.

And no just because someone is nice to you does not mean that you owe them anything. Yes by all means be nice back and remain respectful, but you in no way owe them gratitude, friendship, or respect. Especially since they are doing something that a decent human being would do regardless of the “reward”. Gratitude is something that is saved for when something is done for you that is truly nice and out of the norm. You know like when you are grateful your mother gave you the new book you wanted for your birthday. Friendship and respect are things that are earned through meeting and getting to know people. They are not things to be given out lightly unless you choose to do so. It is not my job to make you feel better about your “nice” deeds by making you my friend, being grateful, or even respecting you further than the “you are a fellow living creature on this planet” respect that everyone deserves (until they are a complete douche and give you a reason to take that away from them). By all means, be nice. But do not expect me to give you anything in return just because you decide to be a nice person. /rant

And now that I have said that, you might really want to read the article. It was speaking about “Nice Guys” and not guys who are nice. Believe it or not there is a difference. So read and think before you spout.
Notes
1. nanagrossout liked this
2. haleighcat reblogged this from gravastars and added:
  
  ^^^ Thank you for being a real person and understanding people - who are complex and individual and real - are not able...
3. bitch-cakes reblogged this from tumblinfeminist
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15. i-sauntered-vaguely-downwards reblogged this from mstashers and added:
  
  ^^ THIS COMMENTARY! Seriously being generally respectful and getting your cookie for meeting the minimal requirements...
16. mstashers reblogged this from ceasesilence and added:
  
  And no just because someone is nice to you does not mean that you owe them anything. Yes by all means be nice back and...
17. thedeeface liked this
18. ceasesilence reblogged this from lawsonry
19. tacticalnymphomania reblogged this from theblessedfaithless and added:
  
  (Sorry about all the edits, my HTML was being a dick.) There’s a difference between being “nice” and being actually...
20. micergey reblogged this from avali
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29. madeleinemagnolia reblogged this from howdoyoupronouncemaczka and added:
  
  Joseph, this article clearly isn’t about you! Or guys like you! For me, it just reminds me of all the guys who complain...
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37. unbrokencircle reblogged this from hermione-ganja and added:
  
  Yeah, wow, what the fuck. I used to be a Nice Guy back in when I was about 16 or so, the main thing that kicked me out...
38. lokisaur liked this
39. howdoyoupronouncemaczka reblogged this from madeleinemagnolia and added:
  
  Fuck this article! I am a nice guy. I believe women, all women (not just the ones I’m interested in romantically) should...
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